Hope.

At school there was always a lot of talk about how "broken" we all are, and while there is some truth to this, insofar as we are all touched by original sin and have particular struggles in our lives, I have always been frustrated by this mentality. People who talk about being "broken" often fall into one of two categories: those who think that people who are broken need to be fixed and go back to the way they were, and those who believe that we need to leave our brokenness behind and just move on. 

There is something wrong with both viewpoints. Maybe we are "broken", maybe that's what we can call that terrible unwavering temptation we battle everyday with varying success, but if we are broken we can't simply be fixed. We can't just glue together the pieces and be good as new. Because we aren't... we're better. We're new, we're different. We "break" like muscles, not china vases. With each little break and a lot of God's grace, we are built back up into something stronger than what we were before. Each sorrow, each sin, each trial, when properly treated as the opportunity for growth that it is, only serves to transform us into stronger, deeper, wiser people than we were before. 

And so we cannot, nor should we attempt to, return to our previous state or pretend that nothing ever happened. Something did happen, and maybe it was terrible, awful, no-good, and even very very bad, but somehow it changed us, and we must embrace that (there's really nothing else you can do anyway, so you might as well make the best of it) and allow ourselves to be transformed. And we will be. It might be difficult to see, especially for yourself (it's ever so much easier to see good things working in other people's lives), but the change is there. If you know anything about the Romantic movement in literature, you know what I mean when I say that the person who allows himself to be transformed by such experiences becomes sublimely beautiful. 

So don't despair... we're all mad here, and it's a beautiful, growing, fabulous madness.

PS- for anyone who knows what I mean, think back to the muscle reference and laugh... *poof*

March for Life.

[Animal photo credit: National Geographic "In the Womb" 2005]

Is it such a difficult concept to grasp? It seems obvious that that fourth "clump of cells" is an unborn HUMAN, a tiny tiny child... why then do people insist that this is a matter for debate, that there are complex circumstances surrounding the moment the unborn becomes a person, with all the rights of personhood? So many people willfully blind themselves to the simple fact that this is a real live person, just like you and me. Only smaller and completely defenseless.  Animal lovers everywhere would decry the slaughter of those tiny, perfectly formed, unborn animals you see above. But when it comes to our own species, our own flesh and blood, so very many of us big powerful adult humans think (or at least act like) this slaughter of the innocents is okay.

There is so much wonderful literature out there about life and death, pro-life and "pro-choice" (an oxymoron, since the child gets no choice in the matter), and I feel no need to be repetitive. But I will leave you with this thought:

So to all my friends and the countless others who are at the March for Life today, or attended the Walk for Life in San Francisco this weekend, thank you. Thank you for doing what you can to defend life and give as-yet voiceless infants a voice. Thank you for working to protect them and save our society from its own slow suicide.

The glory of God is man fully alive!

What would you do if you knew you could not fail?

Here are some things I would do to start off with:

Write a book or two.
Become fluent in German, Spanish, French, Italian, Dutch, Latin, and every form of English that has ever existed.
Go sailing.
Learn to play saxophone and Spanish guitar.
Dance salsa, cha-cha, rumba, waltz (Viennese and regular), lindy-hop and various types of swing.
Archery.
Sword-fighting (like knights or soldiers,  not fencing).

Given enough time (and money), I'm sure I could do all of these things. I bet there are lots of things you would like to do as well. So what's stopping us?!?

Fear. Fear of failure, fear of imperfection.

Do you know what? Fear is the only thing that can stop you from living. Death can't even do it on his own, he has to employ fear of the unknown to really kill us. Death is really just the beginning of the next great adventure, but fear... fear stops us in our tracks. Fear can paralyze us to the point of indecision and stagnation, inducing a state of inertia which is nigh impossible to resist. But resist it we must, for a life lived in fear is no life at all, it is mere existence.

I have resolved to stop just existing and really live! It is very difficult to take risks and do anything without knowing and accepting the exact consequences, but I am determined to do so (within reasonable bounds of course; I don't have a death wish). Courage. Courage is not the absence of fear, but taking action in spite of it. I must take courage. We must all take courage. Each and every single day should be an exercise in courage, in knowing all the excuses we could make, all the things that could stop us from succeeding, and making the attempt anyway. Sure, there will be times when we fail. We can't do everything after all. But I am 100% sure that there will be so many more times we will succeed! Almost all the things I haven't done are not undone because of failure, but because I never even tried to do them in the first place!

So this is my resolution: to live. You should join  me.

“I plead with you--never, ever give up on hope, never doubt, never tire, and never become discouraged. Be not afraid.” 

“Have no fear of moving into the unknown. Simply step out fearlessly knowing that I am with you, therefore no harm can befall you; all is very, very well. Do this in complete faith and confidence.” 

~Blessed Pope John Paul II

Just Breathe.

A poem or a prayer I wrote years ago, still helps me ground myself, ironically enough.

Sitting here before You,
I think of who I am:
All I hope, all I dream,
What I can't and what I can.


I hope that I'll be stronger,
I dream of a new day;
The fact that You are there for me
Just blows my mind away.


For I am just a simple girl
And all I'll ever be
Is as a flower in the wind,
Swept away by Thee.

...We'll go sailing

Inspiration in the form of a smooth buttery old-fashioned voice.

"Beyond the Sea" is one of my very favorite swing tunes, and that's saying something. I thought it apropos to post it here, seeing as the name of the blog is taken from it.  Enjoy!

Unlisted

I love  making lists. To-do lists, lists of goals and aspirations, lists of books I've read and books I'd like to read, many, many lists. The "About Me" section on facebook is very handy for making such lists as well and even brings up little pictures of your listed items, which explains why mine is so long... that little click which produces a picture and adds to your list is just so satisfying.

Why is making lists so satisfying? Because when you put something on a list, you exercise some sort of control over it. You categorize it, put it in a box, and tell it to stay there until you can check it off. And it can't do anything about it.

Power. Authority. Confidence. It may sound silly or far-fetched, but if you really get to the heart of the matter, these feelings are what list-making is capable of inciting in the list-maker, and a big part of why making lists is so attractive. To-do lists are particularly prone to this, because by writing down all the things you aim to do, you feel like you have already begun. HOWEVER, you haven't. You have only thought about beginning. That is great. You must think about what you want to accomplish before you go out and do it. But unless you actually do something, or at least try, there is no point to all those lists and that power you felt is only that: a feeling. It is only when you check off items on your list that those feelings may in fact be merited; before that they are just ghosts from the future, shadows of potentiality.

I think it's important to remember that the power or confidence you may derive from lists does not (or at least should not) come from the list (or the check mark) itself. It comes from you. You feel confident because you had an idea and a plan and you followed through with it. You owned that list.

That's all great, but problems arise when you try to put people on lists. I'm not really talking about facebook friend lists and such here, as those are really more to help you control privacy settings than anything else. I'm talking about people-I-want-to-get-to-know lists, possible-future-significant-other lists, "bad lists" and the like. You cannot own a list like that. You cannot box people in like that. Think about a friend and imagine that you were on a list like that that they had made. Do you like that idea? In the first example, at what point did they finish getting to know you so as to check off that little box next to your name? No, they didn't. No one besides God will ever know you completely enough to do that. You never really finish getting to know someone and to think that you have is kind of shallow. In the second example, true love transcends lists and if  you are really in love that person will supersede every "backup plan" and you will forget any other possibilities. No one wants to be your option, they want to be your everything.  How can you put your all into a relationship if you're still holding on to "just in case"s? Let go and take a risk-- if things don't work out at least you'll have "failed while daring greatly", like the Man in the Arena.  And as for the last example, the one about really obnoxious or hurtful people being on your "bad list"... well, what about redemption? Not saying be naive and unrealistic, sometimes people don't change and it really is better to just avoid them, but I think it's very petty to relegate someone to "the bad list" when you're a bit peeved at them.

I apologize if this all seems a bit haphazard or disjointed; I've been avoiding about 63 tangents or so while writing this out with varied success, and I'm still collecting my thoughts on the matter. I guess what I'm trying to say is: lists are great tools to keep track of  your goals, you just have to remember to work towards those goals. If you make lists, make sure they have a point other than decorating your living space with sticky notes. And make sure that the things on your lists are things, not people.  Keep your friends unlisted.

When you have ideas and goals and things to do and then you do them and check them off your list, you can feel so accomplished! Feel the power... feel it! Muahahahaha... those little life goals never stood a chance!

First Post

Well, I had a *brilliant* idea for a first post, but after going through all the tedious necessities that one must go through to set up a blog, I have forgotten it. It was probably something nice and philosophical explaining the title of the blog and how life is an adventure, et cetera, et cetera.  Instead I suppose I could explain the point of this blog, since all things should really have a point, and this one, in fact, does.

"What is the point?" you might ask. "Why am I here reading these random thoughts when I could be doing ______, ______ or ______ (insert activities you normally avoid by browsing around the internet here)?"  Well really I'm just writing here because I miss writing, I want to keep up writing, and I keep being inspired to write (unfortunately for you, I tend to forget these inspirations well before pen and paper or a computer become available to me).  I believe that every written thing should be intended for an audience (there are those who claim some things should be written just for the sake of being written, but they are probably the authors of the lamest of 'artsy' works). Things can be written for certain types of people, for specific acquaintances or friends, or even for oneself. I like to write letters to God. But this here is for you. All you lovely people (assuming you exist) who just  might take a liking to something I might think up. And whether you like it or not, please feel free to comment so that I don't feel like I'm just writing to myself publicly. Because that is weird.  Almost as weird as talking to yourself, or your computer, or phone, or car, or book, or any other uncooperative inanimate object at hand.

ANYWAY, I sincerely hope that inspiration returns to me in time for the next post, because otherwise I fear that you all will be very bored, and possibly confused. I would like to warn you in advance (if you haven't already noticed) that I am probably overfond (all right, let's admit it-- addicted to) of parentheses and ellipses (those three little dots in a row, supposed to mark a place where material has been left out, but commonly used to denote a long pause. A period could be used instead, but it just feels too staccato sometimes). I apologize.

Here is a little excerpt from the song that inspired the title of this blog (sorry, I switch gears completely and without warning quite frequently. I hope you don't get motion sickness): 
"It's far beyond the stars
it's near beyond the moon
I know beyond a doubt
my heart will lead me there too"
What is far beyond the stars and near beyond the moon to which my heart, like Bobby Darin's, will lead me? Well in the original song it's his lady-love, but to me it's joy and beauty and truth and love and just all those things that make up Life. 


Oftentimes people will say that life is an adventure. I firmly believe this, and that it is our responsibility to remember this and treat it as such. However, many people seem to think that living life as an adventure means always seizing the moment and doing epic things. Sometimes life can be kind of boring or tedious, or just full of waiting. But if life gets that way, NEVER FEAR! Adventures are full of those kinds of moments! Those are the moments that lead up to the exciting bits, the ones that actually make the exciting bits exciting! If everything was always epic, epic would be normal. And then epic would be boring. 


So how do you treat life like the adventure that it is and also reconcile yourself to the less interesting parts of your adventure? Don't spend your life skipping from one high moment to the next. Embrace the journey. Own it. Every last little bit: the exciting parts, the boring parts, the fun parts, the sad parts, even the parts you forget. And mostly, just live. Be. Be ALIVE! As G.K. Chesterton (one of my all-time favorite authors) said, "The glory of God is man fully alive." Don't be a dead fish waiting for life's adventure to happen to you! Be marvelously and gloriously alive, and then you will see the wonder in every single breath.


Adventure is out there! Caw caw, rawr!


(if you don't recognize that, watch Up!)